Meet the Undateables: John and Danielle

Each week, we take two New Yorkers who swear they’re totally undateable, and put our matchmaking skills to the test

Will Gleason
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TK

Photograph: Ann Sullivan

Why they’re single:
John: He broke up with his longtime girlfriend in January.
Danielle: She gets ghosted a lot and finds it hard to make a connection online.

Ideal date:
John: Taking a cooking class at the International Culinary Center
Danielle: A live show or podcast recording, followed by a drink at a low-key bar

THE DATE

First impression
John: “I got there early. I was nervous and wanted to make sure everything was lined up. When she came in, she looked great—very manicured, beautiful and clean-cut.”
Danielle: “The hostess said they seated him at the bar. There were two guys there, and I was like, Oh, thank God it wasn’t the other one. He was really cute and very personable.”

Chemistry
John: “At first, she was a little too quiet. After the first hour, she opened up a bit more, and her personality really meshed with mine. We ended up talking for five hours.”
Danielle: “I think there was an initial attraction, and then, just personality-wise, we got along really well. I think we were on the same page about a lot of things.”

Awkward Moment
John: “She was eating a soup dumpling, and it squirted all over the place. We just giggled about it, and then I did the same thing, so she didn’t feel too awkward about it.”
Danielle: “I was teasing him about cutting into his soup dumpling on the plate and letting the broth pour out. Then I bit into mine and the broth just went everywhere.”

Afterward
John: “We kept talking over dessert and had a couple more rounds of drinks. I took her to the subway stop, we kissed and exchanged numbers, and then I went home.”
Danielle: “We left and exchanged numbers outside. Based on the state of my glasses after, there was some making out, but I don’t really remember. I was pretty drunk.”

Verdict
John: ♥ “We’ll see each other again. I haven’t had many five-hour experiences like that with another human being. It was fun and easy in the most flattering way.”
Danielle: ♥ “It was the best first date that I’ve had in a long time. It went great. I was sort of worried about it, but it ended up being a lot better than my expectations.”

Our daters went to Brooklyn Chop House (150 Nassau St, 212-619-1200)

RECOMMENDED: See more Undateables

Want to be set up on a free blind date? Email undateable@timeout.com.

Best date ideas in NYC

  • Drinking

Taste great whiskey and learn some fascinating facts at Great Jones Distilling Co., which opened to the public in 2021 as Manhattan's first and only legal whiskey distillery in over 100 years. The 28,000 square-foot venue operates as a fully functioning distillery with a tasting room and several drinking and dining venues, including an underground speakeasy and a full restaurant. 

Couples can book several different experiences, including a tour detailing the whiskey-making process ($35), a culinary cocktail pairing experience ($145) and a hands-on mixology class ($110). 

  • Lower East Side

Ye’s Apothecary ranks as one of New York City’s best date spots. Exceedingly pretty with has an air of speakeasy about it, the venue will turn "getting to know you" into a little more. Descend and make a sharp right: a cinematic bar is over your shoulder, set with gleaming emerald tiles and a few seats facing illuminated shelves as studied as a still life. The expanse of the long, jewel-toned venue is to the left, where elegant light fixtures float above banquettes and candlelit, marble tables.

It’s all very intimate, both as a euphemism for manageably tight and as a mood. 

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  • Health and beauty
  • Spas

Maybe this one isn't for a first date. But once you are more comfortable with your significant other, get your sweat on at a sauna or relax in a lantern-lit pool together.

Some local spas offer or even specialize in couples massages for a romantic date option. NYC spas range from affordable to all-out luxurious. Treat yourself to a pampering at one of these spas — you two deserve it.

  • Sex and dating
  • Sex & Dating

How about a date that has been set up for you? The Metropolitan Museum of Art's beloved "Date Nights" give visitors an opportunity to become acquainted with artwork with informal drop-in gallery chats, the chance to listen in on gorgeous live music and sip on yummy cocktails.

"Date Nights" are held every Friday and Saturday nights in the American Wing Café from 5pm to 9pm. Even better, date nights come with museum admission, which is always pay-what-you-wish for New York State residents and NY, NJ, and CT students with valid ID. And this time, advance tickets are not required. 

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The low-key dazzling Speakeasy Magick brings close-up magic table by table throughout a dark speakeasy where drinks flow and tricks await. 

Hosted by Todd Robbins (Play Dead), who specializes in mild carnival-sideshow shocks, Speakeasy Magick is a moveable feast of legerdemain. Audience members are visited at their tables by a series of performers in turn.

Robbins describes this as “magic speed dating.” One might also think of it as tricking: an illusion of intimacy, a satisfying climax, and off they go into the night.

  • Things to do
  • City Life

Board a Classic Harbor Line cruise for a romantic evening on the '20s-style Yacht Manhattan—made extra cozy with ample pillows and corner tables. Order a glass of champagne to sip as you pass the amazing One World Trade tower, sailboats gliding peacefully, and Jersey City's many high rises. As the sun dips lower in the sky, the light bounces off different buildings, especially the Empire State Building, which seem to glow like a torch.

You can reserve your trip here or call the Classic Harbor Line NYC phone number (212) 627-1825. Make it a double date to get a price break on tickets.

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  • Art
  • Art

Sure, those selfies on your phone are cute, but take things to the next level with professional selfies at the new FotoLab. It's NYC's first self portrait photography studio, and it makes for a super fun date. 

At this Chelsea spot, you and your sweetie can cozy up in the studio to get some adorable photos together. There's music pumping through the studio, and you can bring some props (or a pet), so even if you're camera shy, you'll feel totally comfortable.

Maybe you'll even take things to a major next step and save this photo for a holiday card together.

  • French
  • Greenwich Village
  • price 3 of 4

A West Village institution with classy decor, Minetta Tavern serves up that famous burger that’s on your bucket list. After your splurge, turn things up a notch at Marie’s Crisis Café, the iconic piano bar down the street. You can listen to some show tunes and join in the singing once you’ve got a few drinks in you. Who knows, maybe you and your date will harmonize!

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  • Sports and fitness
  • Sports & Fitness

Go ahead and make a racket because ping pod pods—appropriately called PingPod—are now open across NYC. They're open 24/7, so whether you're looking for a daytime date or a late-night option, you can head to a PingPod location of your choice for some good old-fashioned fun. 

If your date can't volley some jokes while gently hitting a plastic ball across the table, well, maybe that's a foul.

  • Nightlife
  • Nightlife
  • Lower East Side

Drop your inhibitions at this seductive, throwback lounge. Cheeky performers will leave you and your date laughing, curious and maybe a bit aroused. From your table by the stage (the space is small enough that there’s not really a bad seat in the house) expect the unexpected as aerial performers, singers, comedians, dancers and sexily clad lads and ladies perform circus and sideshow tricks. You’ll be hard-pressed to find anything like it in the Lower East Side—or anywhere else. Book tickets here.

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