Hey, kids, do you like squeaky-voiced rodents? How about ones who sing the latest pop songs---like "Whip My Hair," only they sub in the word tail, because, like, they are chipmunks!---and drive skateboarders-turned-actors crazy? As for parents: Are you cool with feeling like you're having artificial sweetener sandblasted into your eyeballs for 87 minutes? Most people who are dragged by their kids to this latest disposable franchise entry, in which Alvin (Long) and his Carnival Cruise--ing friends are marooned on a desert island, know what they are getting into, i.e., pop-cultural references ranging from Lady Gaga to Lord of the Rings, and the beginnings of a migraine. Not that such knowledge makes the pandering of such lowest-common-denominator kids' entertainment less grating, or the sight of Jason Lee and David Cross pretending to look at animated vermin while furtively wondering how they'll spend their checks any less depressing.
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