The best Subway sandwiches, ranked from worst to best

What's in it: 100 percent real ingredients

After the lawsuit that claimed Subway’s tuna wasn’t real tuna was dismissed, Subway created an entire page to testify that it is. It’s as real as you or me, honest. But that still doesn’t mean you should order fish from a restaurant where underpaid sandwich artists are in charge of the refrigeration of the totally 100 percent real tuna. Order literally anything else. As long as it’s real.

What's in it: It's basically all the toppings: lettuce, spinach, tomato, cucumber, green pepper and red onion

Subway's lone veg option leaves much to be desired, especially when it comes to the melding of ingredients. This sando leans woefully dry unless you upgrade it with sauce (spring for the vinaigrette) or cheese (pepperjack adds some zing). Heck, do both. It's basically a sad salad without the low-carb benefits.

What's in it: Roasted chicken breast and topping on (we'd suggest) Italian

Just looking at this sandwich dries out our taste buds. While the chicken breast isn't offensive, it's certainly no match for the juicy—albeit less healthy—you'll find at numerous fast food restaurants. You'll definitely need to dress with this one.

What's in it: Shaved steak and American cheese, plus we'd suggest green pepper and red onion on Italian bread

Two things should never be allowed to leave Philly: the sports fans and this sub. The cheesesteak was never designed to be stripped down and health-ified; it's the kind of thing that should be dripping in juices and Cheez Whiz. Save your calories for the real deal.

What's in it: Teriyaki-glazed chicken strips and sweet onion sauce

Well, it has flavor, we’ll give it that. Though the most common complaint against Subway is blandness, this went in an entirely different—even less pleasant—direction. The near-candy level of sweetness left us gasping for water and looking for a toothbrush.

What's in it: Ham, salami, bologna

All of the cold cuts on this meaty sandwich are turkey-based (yes, even the ham), which kind of blows our minds when we think about it for too long. The barrage of pink meat can be a bit much, even for carnivorous eaters. Six inches will be plenty, thank you.

What’s on it: Double pepper-jack cheese, steak and Baja Chipotle sauce

This is a sandwich to eat when you’re on the road from the law. Renegades like you want cheesy steak subs drowning in Baja Chipotle sauce, which makes sense since you’re fleeing to Mexico. Like all the Subway cheesesteaks, it’s got way more cheese than steak. Which is just what a rule-breaker like you wants, I guess?

What's in it: Black Forest ham on, we'd suggest, nine-grain wheat

What this sandwich lacks in ingenuity, it makes up for in staying power. After all, who can hate on a classic ham sub? Mayo and mustard only add gas to the eternal flame, so don't be stingy.

What's in it: Angus roast beef—plus, we recommend English mustard with this one and served on wheat 

If you've ever spent time skiing in the French Alps, you may have occasionally heard the phrase "Alez, roast beef!" before someone in a Teflon-coated, skin-tight all-in-one body suit zips past you and down the black run at twice the speed of sound. The love the English show for roast beef is well-founded, it's because it is basically melt-in-your-mouth steak. And as such, it's nearly impossible to go wrong with this classic. 

What's in it: Meatballs in marinara and parmesan cheese on Italian bread, because it has to be

Remember when you were a kid and you loved Chef Boyardee? How you thought all those annoying noodles were just getting in the way of the meatballs? For nostalgia lovers, this vegetable-free option will make it worth splashing red sauce all over your face, hands and work-appropriate shirt.

What's in it: Turkey breast is a given, but we'd suggest a little extra kick of sauce

The no-frill, little black dress of subs. It’s good for anytime, day or night and can be dressed up or down with any veggies, cheese or sauce you feel like that day.

What's in it: Oven-roasted turkey, Black Forest ham and USDA choice roast beef, then pile all your toppings on, add a bit of English mustard, then opt for the hearty multigrain bread.

A small number of Subway restaurants offer regional variations to their menu, so this is not to be confused with the All-American Club. That's a little bit different—it has turkey, ham, hickory-smoked bacon, and American cheese—but it is only available in certain Subway outlets across the country.

What’s on it: Provolone, mayo, MVP Parmesan Vinaigrette and pretty much all the meats: pepperoni, salami, turkey, ham and roast beef.

At least as far as sandwich names go, come on, The Beast? You growl a sandwich name like this as you slap a 20 down on the counter. (Don’t actually do that, for fear of upsetting the sandwich artists.) After barking The Beast order over the sneeze guard, you’ll watch them assemble a heart-stopping half pound of meat. Because you’re a Beast. Or at least super hungry.

What's in it: Genoa salami, ham, pepperoni on Italian bread, because it really should be.

Oh, Genoa salami, pepperoni and Black Forest ham, you are a hot menagé à trois we can't get enough of. After we’ve had a few and it’s late at night, your 750-plus calories of salty spice is the only meat our bodies desire.