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[title]Caitlin Erica is a woman who seemingly knows the real truth about life. A former stripper, birth doula and founder of the wild, women’s-only Strip Her: Pop-Up nights in Sydney (where you become the lingerie-wearing show), this is a person who defies all categorisations. She is purely herself; and the power of something that radical is felt by everyone that knows her – as well as those who don’t.
Time Out sat down and chatted with this queen of sensuality about her experience of sex, power and owning the elusive wonders of female sexuality. We also got the scoop on all her hottest Sydney tips, including her go-to café, nude beach recommendation and favourite strip club.
Turns out, owning your own feminine divine is actually pretty hot.
When did you become interested in exploring this idea of owning your sensuality? What sparked this for you?
I grew up with a lot of body shame and sexual shame, which I began to unravel in my mid-twenties when I noticed that I would only self-pleasure when I’d been drinking. I didn’t want that kind of relationship with myself, so I stopped drinking for a year. I was hungry to break free of my shame but I didn’t really know how. I had this dream of moving into a place with a group of women who were so confident and free in themselves that they would walk around the house naked. I thought if I put myself amongst women who had that kind of confidence, it might rub off on me. I took myself to a nude beach when I was 28 and that was a big deal for me. I didn’t tell anyone. I was just grasping at ways I could find to push myself out of my comfort zone.
You worked as a stripper in Berlin – how did that happen, and what was it like?
My journey really shifted gears when I trained as a birth doula (a professional support person for pregnancy and childbirth). That put me on an unexpected path of reclaiming my femininity and sexuality. Most people don’t connect those dots – we don’t see birth as a sexual event – but it is, physiologically and hormonally. After I completed my doula training, I got a really strong intuitive message, "Go to a strip club". I laughed it off at first, but it was undeniable. I was terrified and kind of confused – but also, it felt like I got a free pass.
It was like, Oh, God said I can be a stripper.
I took myself, trembling, into a strip club and got a job. My first night, I couldn’t stop shaking, but when I got on that stage my legs stopped [shaking] and I felt at home. I loved it. I was dancing on stage in nothing but a g-string, doing the thing that was never part of my parent’s plan for me… and I was still me. It didn’t change who I was on the inside and that was really liberating. I realised that the very thing I thought I needed to protect – my purity – is innate. I got to strip away so much shame and conditioning and it was the first time I truly felt free in my body.
Strip Her has generated a lot of conversation online – why do you think people find a women’s-only strip show so radical and confronting?
There's a lot of shame around sexuality that we have as a society. There's an understanding that, traditionally, strip clubs are for the male gaze. There’s a false assumption that strippers are disempowered, and so the idea that women outside of that world would choose to sexualise themselves is perplexing for some people.
The idea that a group of mostly straight women would want to get together and sexualise themselves is also confusing, because if most of them are straight, then who’s it for?
We’re used to sexuality being transactional. The natural truth is that women love to feel sexy, but we don’t always have a safe space to express that. Strip Her is a safe space of permission for women to express their sensuality just for themselves, without anyone wanting something from them. There’s no pressure, no taking, no transactions – just celebration and support from other women all there for the same reason.
What made you decide to start Strip Her?
The strip club I worked at in Berlin was owned by a woman who never asked to see a photo of anyone before offering them a job. She just had this understanding that if you're a woman, you're sexy, full stop, case closed, no questions. The only question is whether or not you know it, and if you're willing to share that. It was this beautifully diverse smorgasbord of women. Each of these women had her own flavour, her own style – each woman was captivating in her own way. And I would look up in awe of all the women I was working with, and I would think to myself, more women need access to this, more everyday women need to be exposed to this, experience this. And that’s how Strip Her: The Pop Up was born.
Can you describe what happens at Strip Her?
Women arrive feeling a bit timid. They’re kind of looking around like 'what have I signed myself up for?' We have an opening talk, we make sure that we're all on the same page, we talk about expectations, boundaries, all of that. I lead them through some guided embodiment. And then the women just let themselves unravel in the most beautiful and breathtaking of ways. And it's such an honour and a privilege to be invited in to see that side of a woman and to honour that.
By the end of the event, women are literally just rolling around on the floor like cats, and they're maybe tickling each other with feathers or roses – like women that they've only met that night.
There's this deep, sensual sisterhood connection. It’s confusing for some people because it's sensual, but it's not necessarily sexual, and it's not a pick-up place, and people aren't wanting anything from each other. It's just this celebration of a woman in her feminine essence. At the last event a bunch of the women cried at the beginning and cried at the end, and it was hard for us to leave.
Why do you reckon it’s so important that women own their own sexuality?
Who else should own a woman's sexuality? Really, it's not even about sexuality, it's about owning our bodies. And sexuality is just a natural part of being human, and having a physical body. And if we are repressing any parts of our nature, our instinct, our intuition, our expression, our desires, then we are in a state of self-distrust and self-rejection.
If we're not trusting our body – our home – then we're not living in harmony with ourselves, let alone the rest of the world. It impacts everything we do with our bodies.
The state of childbirth is pretty horrendous right now, the running statistic is that one in three women describe their birth as traumatic. We see birth as something that is fearful and dangerous, and something that is happening to a woman's body rather than through a woman's body. Women don't trust ourselves. And that's because of the way that menstruation is framed in this society. But there's there's a lot to it. It's sexual, it's women's health issues. Women deserve to feel safe and sovereign and sexy in their bodies. And that's it.
What do you think are the main barriers that stop us from doing that fully?
Shame and fear keep us from owning ourselves fully. I find women who, like myself, grew up in religious families, have a lot to unravel. Religion puts one’s authority outside of themselves; it teaches us to distrust the body and its desires. We end up living life doing what we "should" or "shouldn’t" do according to some external force, instead of going within and trusting the body. What I do with Strip Her, both the course and the pop-up event, is help women to strip away their conditioning until they’re left with themselves.
Have there been any standout amazing moments at 'Strip Her'?
At the very first pop-up event in 2022, none of the women took to the change rooms to undress. I thought I’d really messed up and not been clear about what the event was, but after two graduates of my eight-week course opened the stage with the first performance, the other women literally jumped to their feet and threw off their clothes, screaming.
The night went from zero to a hundred in six minutes. It blew my mind. It showed me just how much women are aching for a safe space to unleash.
Women who didn’t know each other were crawling around like kittens, caressing each other with roses and giving each other lap dances. I can’t even describe it. We’ve also had a couple of pregnant women take to the stage and the crowd went absolutely wild for that. That was really inspiring.
Sydney's not exactly a city that's known for its openness to sexual exploration. What do you think Sydney offers people who are keen to discover their own sensuality in a way that's personal to them?
I’m discovering Sydney all over again after being away for 10 years, and there are a bunch of events that I’m really excited about. When it comes to a playful and provocative night out, Show Us Ya Tips is a brilliant night out that raises money for Sex Workers Outreach Project Decolonise Sex Work Australia. Club Sandwich with Betty Grumble is another killer performance night – as with anything Betty Grumble.
There are practitioners across Sydney who run some powerful and educational events, from consent workshops to erotic massage, and energetic orgasms.
For anyone looking to go deeper and really open up sensually, I’d look into the world of tantra and somatic sexology. There are practitioners across Sydney who run some powerful and educational events, from consent workshops to erotic massage, and energetic orgasms. White Dakini, Ali Hedone, Alchemy and Eros, Scarlett Wolf and Vulva Dialogues are a few. If you’re wanting to explore more kinks, I hear Studio Kink is the place for that. If you’re curious about ethical non-monogamy, ENM Australia and The Open Circle offer social and educational events. We’ve also got a few nude beaches around Sydney so that’s really special. Swimming naked is wonderful and it’s free. Or there’s nude yoga with Naked Awakening.
Obviously if you’re a woman, you want to come to Strip Her: The Pop-Up. It’s the only night that brings the audience members onto the stage to take up space and be celebrated for their untamed expression and sensual dance. No experience necessary.
Now, for some rapid-fire Sydney questions...
Best strip club? Strip Her: The Pop-Up, of course!
Best women's-only safe space? McIver's Ladies Baths in Coogee.
All-time favourite Sydney meal? After 10 years overseas, my comfort food is chips and gravy… from anywhere. Or if I’m feeling spesh, Totti’s. I love Italian.
Best bar for a mid-week drink? Earl’s Duke Joint in Newtown for a cosy evening vibe, or Cafe Bikini in Bondi on a sunny day.
Best beach? Bronte.
Go-to café? The Shop & Wine Bar in Bondi.
Favourite date spot? I don’t know – somebody take me!
Best place to dance? In the street, whenever you feel like it, with the sun on your face. I throw on my headphones and dance-walk through Bondi.
Favourite natural spot? Any of the coastal caves in Bondi or Bronte.
Favourite secret spot? It’s still a secret.