Roxanne Toh, wife of Artichoke's head honcho Bjorn Shen, reflects on her life being married to a chef
People always ask if being wife to a chef means I get to eat lots of good food at home. Trust me, I don't. After a day of standing behind stoves, the last thing chefs want to do when they get home is cook. But is marrying a chef really that different, what with all the crazy kitchen nightmares that we see in films and on TV? One year after we tied the knot, I can confidently say: not really.
The biggest difference is in the hours. Most people don't realise that chefs work opposite hours from the rest of us. So Bjorn's work was what took precedence and, for lack of a better word, dictated our lives. Our late-night fights over the phone and sitting in his battered, phlegm-coloured car were awful and touched on the same old issues. But he and I had one common goal: to make our relationship work. And in retrospect, it was worth every missed family gathering or wedding dinner or birthday bash.
It was difficult in the initial years. Bjorn spent many Sunday evenings clearing his sleep debt, and our date nights were, by default, on Mondays. That's of course barring any drama, with private events or special orders for the week, that came in on that day. I don't think Bjorn did anything specific to make up for things or to make me understand. It was over time, through my ad hoc cashier/waitress duties at Artichoke and my interacting with the team, that I understood Bjorn's not the only one with his balls to the wall.
Everyone else is also sacrificing their date nights, family vacations, parties and that epic football match so you have one hell of a good meal at Artichoke. And there'll always be a freak accident in the kitchen, a day that the dishwasher calls in sick, a creepy-crawly from our herb garden on a customer's smoked salmon pancakes, or a disgruntled diner in the snaking brunch queue. Is it possible that they happen all at once, and on the very same day that you've RSVPed for two for your friend's baby's first-month party? Definitely.
It was only in the last year or so, since joining the Artichoke family full-time, that I've come to see how Bjorn has gone against all odds to be where he is today, and poured his life into the business to see it succeed. From making mezzes the talk of the town and being a United Nations chef ambassador for Asia Pacific, to lecturing at The Culinary Institute of America and writing his own cookbook, Bjorn's worked his arse off. And he’s still doing it.
I continue to have so much respect for this bloody cutthroat industry, and really can't think of anywhere else I'd rather be. It’s here that I'm constantly reminded that we're human after all, doing what we love to do. Wouldn’t change it for a thing.
Check out Bjorn’s new Thai fried chicken restaurant, Bird Bird, at 18 Ann Siang Rd.