How has it been different for you when having sex with a man versus when having sex with a woman? Anything that stands out in your experience?
I'm female and all appearances considered most people would consider me straight. However, my sexuality fluctuates depending on who I'm with at the moment. When I have sex with a man, I, personally, become more submissive and I like for the guy to take control. I can get really wild and have horny sex on the kitchen table. When I'm with a woman, I tend to be
more protective and enjoy the romance and the sensuality a bit more. It's easier for me to have casual sex with men, while it's easier for me to feel a deeper connection with a woman. – F, 29
What BDSM practices have you tried? How far have you ventured, and what about it is enjoyable?
It's hard to say how far I've ventured into BDSM because it is such a wide and eclectic category that different people engage in different elements of it. Personally, I've engaged in biting, spanking, hitting, choking, rope-play, edging and some bondage (blindfolding and gagging). I've also dabbled in watersports, but I realized (very quickly) that it's not for me. What I find most enjoyable about BDSM is the element of control. There's always a partner that dominates and one that submits. The person who dominates gets to dictate how much pleasure, pain or both they would like to give to their
partner. Of course, the partner has just as much control over the situation by either begging for more or ending the scene (for example, using a safe word). I like that you're pushing yourself (and others) to the extreme of pleasure and pain, yet it's all still within the boundaries of consent. – M, 29
What do you get out of anal sex you couldn't get from other types of sex? (What makes it pleasurable? Any tips for beginners?)
I think part of what people get out of anal sex is that it's a bit weird (and that in itself is thrilling). But anal stimulation is actually pleasurable by itself in its own unique way (like how vaginal and clitoral stimulation are different, there's this third). For me, personally, part of what I enjoy is feeling full (I like double penetration). Friends have actually asked me for anal tips, and I'd say the most important thing is to have comfortable and candid communication with your partner—you both need to be clear about what's ok and what's not. Relax and be sure to have lots of lube on hand—you don't
want to get microtears in the anus area (it's painful and dangerous). Start small... begin with a pinky finger joint, and work up to an index finger... and when you're about to take a dick up your ass, start with just the tip! – F, 32
How does it feel to be a virgin at an age when most of your peers are not?
Most people know or actually assume I'm a virgin, which is almost 100% due to my religion. I don't think sex before marriage is a sin, but for me, personally, I believe in the sanctity of the body. Also knowing myself, I feel like it would drive me crazy to a point where it's not healthy. I've French kissed before and stopped myself from going further. I used to feel self-conscience about it in college, but my friends and peers respected my decisions. While they make fun of me sometimes, they [also] hold me to a different standard for it. I think once I'm in a relationship, the courting period will not last very long. Like a lot of people, I am afraid the first time will be awkward, painful and not enjoyable, but I'm looking forward to seeing what everyone is raving about. We shall see. LOL. – F, 28