24 ways to piss off a San Franciscan

People with great taste move to San Francisco from all over the world. In fact, it’s rare to find a true native, much less someone who’s been in San Francisco since before the first dot com boom and bust. If there’s anything a true San Franciscan secretly (or not so secretly) loves, it’s getting ticked off at transplants. Here are 24 surefire ways to piss off a local.

1. Refer to San Francisco as “San Fran” or “Frisco.” Some old-school natives are okay with “Frisco.” No one, however, is okay with “San Fran.”

2. Call it Golden Gate Bridge Park.

3. Name anything after Willie Brown while he is still alive.

4. Cheer for the Dodgers or saying anything positive about either Los Angeles or the Dodgers. There is nothing positive about either.



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5. Mistake a fake cable car for a real one. Cable cars do not have wheels. They have cables. Hence, you know, the name.

6. Disrespect a homeless person.

7. Try to board Muni or BART before anyone has exited.

8. Refer to the 49ers as “The Santa Clara 49ers.”



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9. Claim to be a real San Franciscan when you’ve been living here five years or less.

10. Quote Mark Twain, who never said, “The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.”

11. Request a local drive you down the curvy part of Lombard Street, especially in summer.



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12. Mistake the Bay Bridge for the Golden Gate Bridge.

13. Vote Republican.

14. Wear Google glass.

15. Participate in Critical Mass.



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16. Pay for tickets to Burning Man.

17. Slow down to look for parking places. Real San Franciscans know that there are no parking places.

18. Litter—or place recyclable items in the regular garbage.

19. Drop Gavin Newsom’s name like it’s 1999.

20. Take up two parking spaces with one car.



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21. Reference Rice-A-Roni when discussing food in San Francisco.

22. Utter a negative word about any member of the San Francisco Giants.

23. Ride on the Google bus, especially as it blocks a public bus stop.



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24. Announce that you’re sick of the city and want to move. FINE. GO. LEAVE. GIVE ME YOUR RENT-CONTROLLED APARTMENT AND GET OUT.

Which of your peeves should make the list? Feel free to add in the comments section below.


Check out more city life blogs:
31 things that will definitely happen to you when you move to San Francisco
Reasons San Francisco kicks LA’s ass