Kew Motor Inn
The Liberty Inn
Sixty dollars for two hours or $70 for three buys you a room with adjustable mood lighting and strategically placed mirrors. For $15 more, upgrade to one of the romantic-interlude rooms; you'll score a Jacuzzi and a 42-inch plasma-screen TV, which may come in handy thanks to its six free porn stations. 51 Tenth Ave between 13th and 14th Sts (212-741-2333, libertyinnnyc.com)
St. Marks Hotel
It's competitively priced at $60 for two hours, but if you or your partner(s) have a hard time getting off quickly, you may want to head elsewhere: Each additional hour costs $30. The plus: The hotel accepts only cash and traveler's checks, so your name can't be traced. Rooms include showers and TVs with porn. 2 St. Marks Pl at Third Ave (212-674-0100, stmarkshotel.net)
La Semana
For a spa-like sexperience, snag one of the suites with a Jacuzzi and steam room (three hours for $100). If you're on a budget, opt for a room with a Jacuzzi only (three hours for $85), or a standard room ($73 for three hours). Showing identification is negotiable, but you must be over 18. 25 W 24th St between Broadway and Sixth Ave (212-255-5944, lasemanahotelnyc.com)
Kew Motor Inn
Trek to Queens—the motel is 15 minutes from the Kew Gardens--Union Tpke stop on the E or F train—and get more bang for your buck (literally). Live out your fantasies in one of the nine theme rooms, including Arabian Nights and Oriental Delight (weekdays $63 and weekends $71 for three hours). Or just order room service in one of the standard rooms (weekends $55 and weekdays $51 for three hours). No ID needed if you pay with cash. 139-01 Grand Central Pkwy at Charter Rd, Kew Gardens Hills, Queens (718-969-3000, kewmotorinn.com)
Days Inn, Brooklyn
This brand-name motel is just three blocks from the 36th Street subway station via the D, M, N or R. The staff checks IDs, but makes no record of them and accepts cash or credit cards, but not checks. Rooms run $60 for three hours on weekends, $50 for three hours on weekdays and $15 more for a Jacuzzi. Extend your stay ($99/night) and receive a complimentary breakfast before your walk of shame. 437 39th St between Fourth and Fifth Aves, Sunset Park, Brooklyn (718-853-4141)