Rick's Cabaret

At least 30 slender girls line the 40-foot neon-lit bar on a given night, and though the younger, less synthetic ones are picky, motorboating (Wiki it) is par for the course once you've secured a lap dance. With three floors spanning 10,000 feet, privacy is no problem. Each gal wears a thong or G-string and will sandwich your face between her breasts and rub her butt against your crotch, and they're all surprisingly complimentary while doing so ("I love your hair. You should be a model. Do you have ten girlfriends? You don't? Why not?"). Bonus: If you show up between 11am and 3pm on a weekday, the club offers a $10 prix-fixe lunch (steak frites, crab cake sandwich, etc.).