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"Out Late" is Time Out's nightlife and party column by DJ, Whorechata founder, and Staff Writer Ian Kumamoto, which will publish every other Tuesday. The previous edition highlighted Mercury in Reggaeton, a party that only happens during retrogrades.
New York is a city that has always thrived off grit: We would be nothing without our smelly basements, our dungeons and our dive bars, the fertile ground from which all club culture sprung. But we’re living at a time when the city is getting prohibitively expensive for the freaks and weirdos that once ran nightlife, which means it’s getting harder and harder to find parties that are authentically unhinged.
That’s why when Venus Cuffs started DMing me last year, I knew we would be besties. Through multiple conversations we’ve had over the past year, I’ve learned about her expansive vision for nightlife, a vision that involves women, queer people, Black people, people of color, chaos, and a lot of skin. To me, Venus Cuffs is more than a party producer: She’s an activist, a cultural institution, and in her own sense, a healer. But I’ll get into that later.
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Although Venus has been producing underground parties for years, she began producing her iconic fetish cabaret show, Cuffs Cabaret, in September 2023. For a while, she wanted to produce a show that was sexy and kinky but also classy, the type of event where people could sit down and drink a good cocktail while watching performers get tied up and spanked. But she also wanted to create something that was immersive, where attendees could begin to explore their own relationships to pleasure.
The show is celebration of what it means to be erotic.
Cuffs Cabaret shows typically involve an hour of performances followed by a 45-minute intermission where the audience is encouraged to get up and try out different fetish stations. At her last party, there was a wax station, a spanking station, and an area where you could get tied up. “The show is celebration of what it means to be erotic,” Venus tells me. “I feel like we’re going through a second wave of hating sex workers and rolling back LGBTQ rights. We’re reverting back to a puritan culture where people are scared of sex all over again. But sex is how we all got here.”
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The second half of the cabarets involve more kink-centered performances and a segment called “Dirty Confessions,” where Venus reads anonymous handwritten confessions that audience members submit about their wildest, funniest, and most erotic sexcapades.
Venus Cuffs’ passion for sex comes from a deep place: She understands how important it is in order for us to have a good relationship to our bodies and by extension, ourselves. As a Black woman, she often felt limited in the ways she was allowed to express her own sexuality. That began to change once she began working as a dominatrix, an era in her life when she leaned into a more expansive vision of her own desirability. “One thing that domination taught me was to realize my own power,” Venus tells me. She says a lot of the men she worked with were very heteronormative and alpha male types in their everyday lives, but as soon as they came to her, they wanted to be totally dominated, talked dirty to, and their wallets emptied. “It changed the way I see power in this world.”
Behind closed doors, people are freakier than they often let on.
What Venus is trying to convey is that we have to realize that behind closed doors, people are freakier than they often let on. She’s seen what people ask for when nobody is watching, and she wants us to be more honest about our desires and be brave enough to pursue them.
But there are many elements in the world that prevent most of us from fully experiencing pleasure. None of us walk into the bedroom with a blank slate; everyone has their insecurities, their own set of conditioning that tells them, for one reason or other, that they’re not sexy enough. But keeping those voices inside your head only makes them louder. Venus wants people to know, in a non-corny way, that every body is beautiful and absolutely worthy of feeling really good.
And that’s where the healing comes in, especially if you’re someone who doesn’t fit neatly into America’s version of who is desirable. Venus brings people from all walks of life into a room, dims the lights and gives her audience permission to explore. Her cabarets are filled with sensuality, but they’re also imbued with laughter and lots of jokes—Venus is the type of person who doesn’t take herself too seriously. Her joy is infectious and it’s an important reminder that nothing is that deep. It’s through her and her cabarets that I’m really beginning to decode the primary ingredient for pleasure: It’s playfulness, namely the type of playfulness that had Venus roaring with laughter while she spanked me at her last party.
It’s ok if people feel nervous about coming into a space like this, but I just want them to exist in the moment.
“You might not always know what you’re walking into, but it’s always going to be a good time,” Venus tells me. “It’s ok if people feel nervous about coming into a space like this, but I just want them to exist in the moment.”
I attended her last cabaret on Sunday, April 28, which included performances by KissMeDeadlyDoll, Cute but Deadly, Pain Au Chocolat, Gigi Holliday, Amadeus Lopez, Ruby, Quinn Reeru, Nita B Yellowcakes, Casper, Carnal Authority and Pan Daddy. This is how it went.
An hour-by-hour account of a night at Cuffs Cabaret
4pm
I arrive to the venue on time and there's a line of people waiting outside. Most are women, and many are wearing black.
4:20pm
I get seated at my table at the center of the space, and on the table, there's a complimentary O-ring and two sheets of paper for attendees to write their dirty confessions. Nita B Yellowcakes is gogo dancing in knee-high pleasers and feeling herself to the music in front of the DJ. On stage, there are two people and one of them is tied by a chain to a spreader bar while the other is kissing their body and holding a sharp knife. I'm intrigued.
4:44pm
Venus' voice booms overhead. Her tone is erotic and very theatrical. "I want you to forget the world outside of these doors," she says. "Taboo doesn't exist here." After her monologue, Cuffs appears out of nowhere and apologizes for being so dramatic.
4:45pm
Performances start and each is extremely shocking in its own way. There's one I'll remember for a very long time by aerialist Amadeus Lopez, who hangs on an aerial hoop with his mouth and spins. The whole time I'm caressing my jaw—somehow, my mouth hurts.
5:30pm
The 45-minute intermission beings and everyone disperses throughout the space. There are people making out, dancing, or getting drinks at the bar. Venus is spanking people with a flogger over a spanking bench on stage, and she summons me to come up.
Let me give you an idea of how much I respect Venus Cuffs: I let her spank me in front of dozens of strangers and it's a Sunday, the Lord’s Day.
Let me give you an idea of how much I respect Venus Cuffs: I let her spank me in front of dozens of strangers and it's a Sunday, the Lord’s Day. Deep down, though, I secretly wanted her to ask. It's an honor to get spanked by Venus Cuffs.
6:10pm
The performances continue and there's an iconic showcase by KissMeDeadlyDoll tying someone up in very elaborate knots before they're lifted over the stage.
6:33pm
Gigi Holliday, an icon of the burlesque community, performs a sexy dance to "Giver" by The Suffers.
6:40pm
Venus reads people's Dirty Confessions she collected from the crowd earlier. People are hollering and gasping and clapping. It's such an iconic way to wrap up the night. Now I know a lot about the strangers sitting around me. Maybe I know a little too much, but at Cuffs Cabaret, there's no such thing.
How to catch the next Cuffs Cabaret
Where: Locations change, so make sure to keep an eye on Venus' Instagram.
When: Several times a year.
Cost: $40-$80
How to get in: Buy a ticket whenever they drop on Venus' Instagram.
The vibe: Sexy and classy with plenty of shock factors.
What to wear: Fetish attire or anything sexy.