Miami, like any major city, has its own code of conduct. There are nuances to living here and you’ll find that not every governing principle is written down, immediately obvious or, for that matter, even official. Some of the most important rules of living in Miami are unwritten as Reddit users will tell you. We’ve compiled a list of the most salient ones people shared, consolidating the commonly suggested traffic rules (like forgetting your car has a blinker) as well as the many nods to the importance of Cuban coffee. Whether you were born and raised here or you’re a transplant still getting a lay of the land, these unwritten rules are sure to enlighten and, if nothing else, give you a reason to laugh.
1. In Miami, rules are for other people. – TheGoodPane
2. If you think the current weather has ruined your plans, just wait a while to see if that’ll still be the case. – sofritas–chucucho
3. Don’t trust what you see. Miami is like a real-life Instagram filter. Some lifestyles don’t seem like what they are, aren’t as rich, aren’t as popular etc. – hcardona111793
4. Don’t worry about being late for something, it probably hasn’t even started yet. – dracsapphic
5. One out of four people in Miami carries a gun in their car. Don't road rage in Miami. – watchheroes
6. People would rather see you wreck than let you merge in front of them. – Key–Mathematician–88
7. Duck Peacocks. No matter how late you are, let them cross the road. – Dre_A35
8. Miami Time is a real thing, lean into it, or you're just going to be annoyed. – The_Swayzie_Express
9. Spanglish is the official language 🤣 – MsFabulous157
10. Coladas must be shared. – Lpecan
11. If you don’t have a weird obsession with Cuban coffee, you don’t belong here – coolerkid9090
12. If you are late anywhere, bring a colada. – Elegant–Contact4261
13. Don't leave your car unlocked and don't leave anything valuable visible. People have no problem breaking a window here – Impossible–Change–52
14. Don’t trust the $30,000 millionaire: It’s usually a guy who makes $30k a year but walks around talking shit and trying to convince people he is a millionaire. (Leased car, fake fancy watch etc.). – Dangerous_Item_6879
15. Never ever ever under any circumstance use your turn signal. It is a sign of weakness and you will likely get cut off. – KaFot
16. Just mind your own business. Someone honks their horn? Make sure you’re not about to crash into them or you’re not sitting when you should be going. You hear yelling? So long as it’s not someone screaming or yelling for help; just walk away. – ishkir
17. Don't buy speakers from people in a parking lot. – .gus0808
18. You’re low-key culturally Hispanic even if you’re 100% gringo. – yakubiandevil
19. No one truly wants to help you. Everything is a scam. – SurgeHard
20. Floor it once that fucking light turns green, fam! Period. – Ironxgal
21. Do NOT approach a river’s edge or creek’s edge; there is a gator in there. – IceColdKila
22. Don’t assume just because there’s a red light and you have the walk signal that cars aren’t going to run you over. – coolerkid9090
23. DJs are considered “live music” – coolerkid9090
24. If you pay for mangos, you have no friends. – coolerkid9090
25. Cleaning up after your dog is optional – breadchastick03
26. It's rude to prolong a conversation in the sun. Move to the shade as soon as you start talking. – Guinness2013
27. Live close to work or die. – Guinness2013
28. Don’t take I-95 between 7–9am and 4–6pm. – SaulJoker
29. Don’t gossip about anyone because you’re probably talking to their boyfriend's cousin's coworker's friend's sister. EVERYONE is connected!! So be prepared for word to travel fast! – RosePricksFan
30. Don't expect to make friends easily. Finding love is harder than anywhere else. – Briscoetheque
31. You never ask people what they do within the first 10 minutes of meeting them. It's an extremely annoying habit that Northeasterns seem to have brought with them. OG Miamians know better than to ask that without getting to know someone first. – RepairNo6163
32. Everything takes five tries. – 4friedchiknsandacoke
33. Go ahead and double park. – IceColdKila
34. If you're leaving Miami Beach after 11pm and want to head north, don't take the MacArthur Causeway. – Bigred2989–
35. Left lane is the slow lane, right lane is for stopping – monsterdick99
36. Towing is big business in Miami. Pay for your parking and don't park in the wrong places. – papayaandbananabro
37. Christmas doesn't start until you hear the old Santa's jingle on the radio (or a reference to it) and the Power96 version of el burrito sabanero. – tiffyvariedad