Time Out investigates: Why are dinosaurs taking over Melbourne right now?

Cloned from similar events in Manchester, Houston and Berlin, this larger-than-life experience offers IRL movie magic for youngsters who aren’t content to merely pore over dinosaurs on-screen. Franchise cash-in or not, it’s an absorbing visit executed with Spielbergian polish.

Quantity of dinosaurs: A stacked cast of mostly herbivorous cuties, with several full-scale animatronics and some eye-wateringly adorable baby dinosaurs that guests are encouraged to pet.

Quality of dinosaurs: Hollywood-worthy. The dinosaurs are sometimes artfully obscured by foliage, and the scaly, personable heads that pop out look impressively life-like in motion.

Entertainment: Self-guided with interactive stops, the exhibition will keep families occupied for an exciting but perhaps brief 50 minutes. There are fossils for kids to uncover, and the questionable opportunity to touch dinosaur faeces (seemingly an attempt to capitalise on the lucrative slime toy craze).

Education: Less of a focus here. The committed staff spout facts about Barbara the brontosaurus’s habits and diet, and placards share info about ancient plant life – but there's not too many people stopping to learn up on these background details.

Scare factor: In the final display, dramatic lighting and a towering T-Rex left a few little reptiles cowering in their parents’ arms. The velociraptor room also has a troublingly kinky, sadistic vibe, with bound raptors leering out at guests with obvious displeasure. Rawr.

Gift shop: All of the merch is specific to Jurassic World, pencils and keychains and thermoses all emblazoned with that iconic T-Rex logo. There’s a stuffed toy made to resemble the iconic gates of Jurassic Park, and we want to meet the strange, antisocial child who would yearn to sleep with this product every night.

Value for money: At $50 for adults and $40 for kids, it’s not a cheap day out. It’s arguably not even a day out, with the exhibition’s linear layout funneling groups through within an hour or less. 

An informative slow-burn compared to the showbiz spectacle of Jurassic World: The Exhibition, Melbourne Museum is graciously playing host to the largest T-Rex skeleton ever displayed in Australia. The atmospheric exhibition pads out the grand fossil reveal with interactive learning elements, telling the story of Victoria’s life and rebirth.

Quantity of dinosaurs: This is a one-woman show, with grand diva Victoria taking centre stage. She works alone.

Quality of dinosaurs: The opportunity to see such a well-preserved specimen is unmissable for wannabe paleontologists, and even museum guests with a passing interest in cretaceous history should leave impressed. Unearthed in South Dakota 66 million years after her death, the girl’s mahogany-like bones don’t look a day over 500000000 BC.

Entertainment: An emotive intro video made me genuinely root for Victoria, a feathery-headed single mum trying to find a mate and raise her scaly kids in a dangerous world. There’s plenty to smell, touch and hear in the big build-up to the sight of her awe-inspiring bones.

Education: The name of the game here. One particularly illuminating display uses video mapped onto a 3D landscape to depict Victoria’s hunting instincts… and a saucy hook-up with a male suitor (“she will have him”, a British voiceover primly informs us).

Scare factor: Barely there. One interactive booth blares loud roars to convey the T-Rex’s vibrational powers, but no tears from young visitors.

Gift shop: Excellent – it's hard to resist the temporary dino tattoos, baseball caps or a T-Rex crochet kit. There’s a covetable assortment of fashion and toys for kids, all loosely related to dinosaurs and all chic enough to take pride of place in even the most minimalistic of Melbourne hipster homes.

Value for money: Since museum entry itself costs $15, the $32.50 entry price to see Victoria is a wise add-on to your day exploring the museum in full (child tickets to Victoria are $18). The exhibition will take you even less time than Jurassic World: The Exhibition to appreciate, but then there’s the museum’s enduring, broader displays of other dinos to take in, too.

It feels kinda mean to lump in this chill activity with two grandly staged exhibitions. And yet, after a day of worrying about animatronics escaping containment and seeing the true struggles of cretaceous life, it’s blissfully cathartic to witness dinosaurs roaming free in their natural habitat: the sunny grounds of Albert Park’s family friendly mini golf course.

Quantity of dinosaurs: A veritable infestation. Long-necked herbivores smile overhead, two raptors flank the final holes and one poor sucker’s disembodied jaws poke up through the centre of a cubbyhouse (a fave, obviously).

Quality of dinosaurs: Left exposed under the sun and rain of Melbourne’s chaotic weather, these fibreglass dinos have certainly seen better days. They’re also awkwardly flanked by a random assortment of cows, mushrooms and a shark chomping a mannequin leg (wrong Spielberg movie!).

Entertainment: On a warm day with nothing else on your plate? Jurassic Par is an extremely low-stakes and relaxing way to while away an hour or so, bringing a rare Flintstones-esque hangout vibe to the dino-tainment industry.

Education: Certainly not the main attraction here, but the venue’s efforts are still impressive: placards at the foot of each dinosaur sharing their historical period, location and some fun facts. Like the culinary tidbit that noted: “Pterodactyl eggs should not be used in cooking.”

Scare factor: Only an actual infant would feel threatened by Jurassic Par’s dusty inhabitants. 

Gift shop: No dino gifts. The golf shop does offer refreshments, and actual golf stuff for sensible grown-ups who don’t do this kind of stuff with their Saturday afternoon.

Value for money: At $25 for adults and $15 for kids, it’s cheaper than taking your family to the cinema to watch dinosaurs on the big screen. And the photos you’ll take while pretending to fend off a dilophosaurus with a tiny pink club are priceless.