Critics' choice theatre shows in Melbourne

“What’s your damage?” One of the many endlessly quotable lines spouted by Winona Ryder’s Veronica and co in Michael Lehmann’s jet-back comedy, Heathers (1989), it’s also the least likely to get you fired from work. The one about the chainsaw? Not so much… Both explosive utterances make it to the delightfully diabolical stage adaptation, Heathers the Musical. With a book, music and lyrics from the Legally Blonde the Musical team-up of Laurence O’Keefe and Kevin Murphy, it follows an unending parade of non-musical films adapted into song-and-dance stage versions, including Back to the Future, 9 to 5, Groundhog Day, Cruel Intentions, Pretty Woman and Mrs Doubtfire. Are we going to prom or to hell with this take? Directed by Andy Fickman with musical direction from Martine Wengrow, Heathers the Musical may be cheesier than the goofy yet undeniably brutal movie, but the slushy-driven “teen-angst bullshit” spirit of the Westerberg High cohort is still present and incorrect. Far more so than, say, the recent jukebox tone-down of far bleaker film, Saturday Night Fever. It really works, though costume designer David Shields’ popping Veronica in blue over black, is a step too far, copied and pasted from a million teen films, notably Allison in The Breakfast Club. Shields’ school set design is also rather perfunctory, as is Ben Cracknell’s basic lighting, but thank goodness the ensemble ably distracts.  How are those teenagers who want to be treated like human beings? Leading the...

Bernie Dieter and her band of legendary misfits have returned to Melbourne once again, to deliver a serving of debaucherous fun and frivolity. Bernie Dieter’s Club Kabarett, starring the legendary queen of Weimar punk described as an "electrifying cross between Lady Gaga, Marlene Dietrich and Frank-N-Futer in sequins", has taken over North Melbourne's historic Meat Market until May 24. Audiences can expect riotous original songs, immense vocal talent and a jaw-dropping line-up of contortionists, sword swallowers, fire breathers and aerialists. For more info and to secure your tickets, head to the website. Read on for our five-star review of Bernie Dieter’s Club Kabarett from the 2022 Melbourne Fringe Festival. *** It’s easy to see why Dieter’s award-winning show has garnered such esteem since touching down in Australia earlier this year. Less than two minutes in and our M.C., Bernie has thrown off her tartan dress to reveal glittery tights and feather-tipped shoulder pads. Soon after, she’s straddling an audience member and enlisting the help of two others – lovingly named ‘Shaven Haven’ and ‘Silver Fox’ – to carry her back to the stage in the splits. The fourth wall is not so much brought down, as elegantly side-stepped by her sky-high stiletto heel. All the while, Bernie’s quick-wit and dirty mouth find comedic beats in the unlikeliest – or, as it were, the most unwilling – of audience members. "Tonight is about letting loose, letting go, and getting a little bit more...

If you thought history class was boring, Six the Musical is here to change your mind. Created by Toby Marlow and Lucy Moss, this high-energy musical returns to Australia and will be at Melbourne’s Comedy Theatre from July 24. In this foot-tapping show, the six wives of King Henry VIII are reimagined as modern-day pop stars out to reclaim their stories. One by one, Catherine of Aragon (Sarah Murr), Anne Boleyn (Mia Paris Scalise), Jane Seymour (Cara Bessey), Anna of Cleves (Kadesa Honeyhill), Katherine Howard (Angela Brischetto) and Catherine Parr (Lorinda May Merrypor) take the mic, wowing you with their power ballads and rock anthems. Since its breakout debut at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe in 2017, the show has become a global sensation thanks to its infectious songs, sharp wit and empowering message. It’s making a triumphant return to Australia, so get ready to say “Yasss Queen”. For more info and to secure your tickets, head to the website.  Read on for our five-star review of Six the Musical from 2024. *** Divorced, beheaded… live? This unconventional pop rock musical takes a dry historical topic and turns it into a rowdy 80-minute concert to rival the Spice Girls themselves. Everyone knows that King Henry VIII had not four, not five, but six wives – enough to require a mnemonic technique to keep track. History has reduced the legacies of these ladies to little more than singular words in a rhyme detailing their fearsome fates, but what if we carved out space to...

It’s a play considered to be one of the greatest of all time, and after undergoing a show-stopping run in 2023 and 2024, it (and its award-winning star Anthony LaPaglia) are returning to Melbourne once more. Running from August 11 until August 22, 2026, Arthur Miller’s inimitable Death of a Salesman will be staged at Her Majesty’s Theatre for a limited Melbourne run that you don't want to miss.  First performed in 1949, the Pulitzer Prize-winning production explores the promises and pitfalls of the American Dream. The two-act tragedy is told through a montage of memories, confrontations, arguments and dreams of protagonist Willy Loman who tries to navigate what it means to be successful in post-war America. The show runs for about three hours, and generally starts at 7pm on weekdays, with one 2pm performance on Saturdays.  For more info and to secure your tickets, head to the website.   Read on for our five-star review of Death of a Salesman from 2023. *** The curtains of Her Majesty’s Theatre open on Neil Armfield’s magnificent production of Arthur Miller’s Death of A Salesman to reveal a towering grandstand; rusted and weather-stained, ‘Ebbets Field’ printed across the top of its commentary box. All but one of the 14-strong cast are sitting on the bleachers, waiting. "Willy?", Linda Loman asks as her husband limps on stage holding two suitcases. It’s one of the most recognizable images of 20th-century theatre, and it’s keenly watched by the entire ensemble. Miller’s...