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It’s easy to scrunch your nose up when you hear the name ‘Greasy Zoe’s’. It sounds like an American diner, the type of highway-side joint famed for Sloppy Joe sandwiches and sunny side-up eggs rather than sophisticated and inventive produce-driven cuisine.
But the latter is exactly what Greasy Zoe’s is, an unexpectedly thrilling dining experience curated on the outskirts of Melbourne. It’s spearheaded by the wildly creative chef Zoe Birch (ex-Courthouse Hotel and Healesville Hotel) and her intelligent hosting partner and sommelier, Lachlan Gardner.
We’re in the centre of Nillumbik Shire, as far as you can get to the edge of Melbourne before entering regional territory. Birch and Gardner stick to the hyperlocal brief by championing small Victorian producers, described on the menu as Our Family. Even the gorgeous ceramic plateware has been hand-built by local creators. Meanwhile, the menu consists only of the current season’s bounty as well as last season’s ferments, pickles and preserves, all made in-house. There’s a clear ethos of sustainability at Greasy Zoe’s; any green waste the restaurant produces is turned into compost. In addition, the only seafood served is green listed by Good Fish Project.
When we wander in on a Friday night, it feels more like a friendly elf’s cottage than an acclaimed eight-seater restaurant. And yet, we’re oddly surprised to see it operating exactly like it does on the tin – apron-donning Birch, a lone genius dynamo, working calmly in the small open kitchen while Gardner works the floor.
To a soundtrack of soul music on vinyl (Gardner thoughtfully selects records in between serving tables), we settle into our seats and take in the details of the rustic space before us: jars of pickled vegetables and various concoctions, a mushroom statue that sprouts cheekily from a log (hand-carved from reclaimed wood by a local Kinglake artist) and a fat pumpkin sitting on a wooden shelf, amongst other eccentric touches. The leatherbound wine list appears as enchanting as a spell book, but the only magic it contains is of the epicurean kind.
We start off with a glass of 2008 pinot noir brut rosé from Friends of Punch in Kinglake, rich with the flavour of blue cheese-slathered brioche toast. It’s a surprisingly bold beginning, and isn’t wine just so amazing in that way? Gardner is genuine in sharing in the enthusiasm, explaining that the winemaker left the grapes on lees for a number of years until he was happy, and then brightened up the wine’s profile with the red fruit characters of pinot.
Glossy brassica leaves from local growers Veggie Empire top a pair of spelt, pumpkin seed and ricotta cakes for starter snacks. Then comes a kind of mini Down Under-themed wrap: a fermented crêpe laid with a nasturtium leaf, a puddle of macadamia cream and a shimmering, freshly peeled Spencer Gulf prawn. It’s a distinctly Australian-tasting bite, mouthwatering with a Clare Valley riesling.
A glass of grüner veltliner and Zoe’s kelp egg custard with kohlrabi and Yarra Valley salmon roe is, quite simply, the most miraculous pairing of the year for me. The honeyed nut characters of the Austrian white wine serve to enhance the savoury pudding’s creaminess beautifully. One more snack keeps us on our toes, an utter delight: smoked fish on a pastry-like disc made with native grass (from Indigenous-owned Black Duck Farm).
Now we’re on a roll. Up next is a bowl of King George whiting from Corner Inlet, invigorated by a zingy green garlic and whey soup. It’s lip-smacking levels of good, and the crisp, fried oca (a kind of New Zealand tuber) scattered on top plays the supporting character of textural crunch.
Koji-coated lion’s mane and pickled shiitake mushrooms form the flavour base of an exciting broth, which is expertly paired with a peppery beaujolais. Credit to ‘shrooms prepped well, that Easter egg chocolate depth of richness at the bottom of the bowl has got to be one of the best things in the world.
The sourdough bread here is served with kefir-cultured miso butter and wakame salt, and it’s evident that fermentation and ‘living foods’ are a focus for Birch – great for the gut, sure, but even better for lending complexity to flavour.
A few more dishes comprise our 12-course gastronomic journey.
The thigh of a 21-day dry-aged Great Ocean Road duck, cooked for a few hours over the woodfire grill, is a juicy delight in its zesty tamarillo mustard sauce.
Puff pastry, carrot and honey (a sort of carrot tarte tatin, if you will) sounds humble enough, but it’s even more impressive than we expected, our taste buds clinging for more despite our stomachs claiming contentment.
And will there be a cheese course? Yes, but typical of Greasy Zoe’s, it’s like no other in Melbourne – or probably the world. It comes in the form of a toasted wattle seed and brown sugar-filled croissant, topped with 24-hour cheese and a well of wattle seed syrup. Our verdict? Remarkably rich and light all at once.
Dessert is the ice cream sandwich of your dreams, leveraging the sweet flavours of apple, caramel and fejoia. Of course, that’s not the end of things on this cleverly curated gastronomic journey, and so a nutty cereal with rhubarb and burnt butter sends us merrily on our way – but not before a quick friendly chat with Birch and Gardner, who really seem to love what they do. We’re the last ones to leave.
Birch is a technical wizard and a patient and loving inventor, while Gardner is a deeply attentive and collaborative host. So how do I sum up the experience? It’s probably best done in four words: well worth the drive.