I can’t count the number of times I’ve ended up standing behind the behemoth pole in the middle of the Corner Hotel’s band room.
Usually, you find a great spot during the support act that’s nowhere near the pole. Like, nowhere near it. I’m talking all the way to the left where the hidden second stage is or over to the right next to the bathrooms. Right there, the pole is just a small blur in your periphery.
Then, somehow, you get closer. You get so close you start to wonder how it is, during a particularly pleasant, non-moshy set, you’ve managed to shimmy metres closer to the pole. You don’t even remember moving your feet. How is it possible that the pole is now within arms reach?
Soon enough, you’re right up against it. That damn thick pole. And she is thick. When the building was rebuilt in the 1950s, they probably thought, "yeah, we don’t want to skimp on safety here so we’ll build a support beam that has the girth of a small city to make sure the roof won’t collapse." Yay for safety, right?
Standing behind the pole is way worse than being behind a tall person. Tall people sway to the music. Tall people are often very kind and see you craning your neck and let you stand in front of them. This pole does not move for man nor beast nor act of God. It’s like a black hole that sucks your vision right into it. And you never end up in front of it. By some sheer force of will, you always end up behind it. And boy is it not soft. It’s hard. Brutal even. I’ve heard many a story about someone cracking their head against it during a particularly hardcore metal show.
I know what you’re thinking. Wasn’t this a love letter to the Corner Hotel pole, Rebecca? You’re just stating its many faults. And yeah, reader, I know. But I want you to know that even though getting stuck behind the pole sucks, I applaud the Corner Hotel for never getting rid of it. I applaud every single Melburnian who has dutifully served time behind it and I mostly applaud the people who have attempted to climb it like a bear. That takes guts (and some core strength I will never muster).
Do you know why I still love it, despite its faults? That pole is reliable. That pole helps you find your friends when you get separated (truly, how many times have you texted them, “I’m next to the pole” when you get swallowed up by the crowd?) The people standing behind the pole are also some of the greatest people. We all know we’re in a shit spot, but we’re going to enjoy it nonetheless. Additionally, the pole also keeps up the other levels of the Corner Hotel. It is, literally, a pillar of Melbourne's live music industry.
I also need to point out that the absolute BEST spot to stand in the Corner Hotel band room is right in front of the pole. Everyone knows this. Everyone gets there super early JUST to land this coveted spot. Leaning against this pole while singing along to a band you love is one of those great Melbourne moments. Plus, being able to lean against it gives your feet a little reprieve from standing. Way to go pole!
I recently learned that the pole at the Corner Hotel has its own Facebook page and that in August (during Melbourne’s second lockdown) the fine people at the Corner Hotel decided that the pole needed to practice some self care and gave it a nice spit and polish.
I know thousands of people want that pole removed. I know there's even been petition set up for that cause. But why? That pole should stay. It’s an icon of our usually thriving music scene – a music scene better than any other in the world (don’t just take my word for it – we’ve won awards, people).
And isn’t that pole just a great allegory for the coronacoaster that is 2020? Just when you think a gig/life is going well, you somehow end up stuck behind the pole/in lockdown. But hey, you know what? You CAN and you WILL emerge from the behind-the-pole vortex. It’s going to be alright. Your time behind the pole will pass and you will appreciate an unobscured view all the more because of it.
Here’s to you, Corner Hotel pole. You’re a stalwart of Melbourne’s music scene and we can’t wait to see you instead of the band we paid to see again soon. If properly disinfected, I am 100 per cent giving you a hug. Can’t wait to see whether the Corner’s sticky floors are still as sticky as I remember. Also can’t wait to feel the arctic air-con greet my sweaty face once more.
I think this Facebook comment summed it up best: “GO POLE! More interesting than the bands! You are my hero and my guide, my light and my way, my support and my rock. You were there before me, you will be there after me. I love you forever.” Hear, hear!
Want to support Melbourne’s live music scene? Donate to Support Act and read up about Save Our Scene. Both are putting in the hours to help Melbourne's struggling music industry and we're really keen to see Melbourne back to its old tricks soon again.