'We've been here for nearly ten hours now!' rages Adam, wetly, just before the interval. For the audience of this sub-Neil LaBute play about the sex lives of two old uni chums – romantic Adam (Richard Mylan) and laddish James (Charlie De'Ath) – it feels more like 20.
Writer/producers John Muirhead and Mike Charlesworth interviewed 50 online daters as research, but the romantic comedy clichés trundle by repetitively like luggage on a carousel. The love interests are a Prada-armoured maneater and a GSOH in ballet pumps (Suzanne Shaw and Nicola Stapleton).
There's a flaccid revelation involving Adam's ex-wife and James. Projected stats from a dating survey fail to add substance, while someone's iPod does desperate overtime in the name of musical context. And guess who gets to start a fulfilling family life in Belsize Park, and who gets terminal stomach cancer?