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‘My hair grows so fast I think it’s vegan.’
‘It’s not a bloody barbecue if it runs on gas – that’s just an oven!’
‘Gareth has developed a slightly worrying coke problem since moving to London.’
‘So how was the trip? Who’s got chlamydia?’
‘I don’t need to visit Madame Tussauds – I’m my own waxwork.’
‘I’m so fucking tired of people in this fucking city forcing me to question the structural integrity of my Pret bag.’
‘Please don’t have a baby just so your friends can hold it.’
‘He made me sit through an irrelevant meeting, so I got my own back by taking a photo of his disgusting belly.’
‘I just don’t see how anyone could take themselves seriously in a hat.’
Every week you share the weird things you’ve overheard in London. Above, a few perplexing snippets from the past seven days – don’t forget to tweet us your own!
Like Word on the Street? We’ve now made a book of these little beauties! ‘Word on the Street: Ridiculous Things We’ve Overheard in London’ is out now, £6.99. To buy a copy, visit timeout.com/wotsbook.