IKEA dishes ranked

RM10.40

The overcooked penne was a mass of chewy carbs that is only good if you plan on a hard day’s work of walking around IKEA and assembling furniture afterwards. That being said, we quite liked the tomato sauce with soft carrot cubes.

RM7.30

It’s a ham and cheese sandwich. What can possibly go wrong? Let us count the ways: The bun was dry, the ham and cheese-to-bun ratio was woefully lopsided (too much bun, not enough ham and cheese) and most importantly, there were tomato wedges in the sandwich. Who puts tomato wedges in their sandwiches? IKEA, apparently.

RM16.90

Is this IKEA’s ‘healthy option’? We’re here for perfectly seasoned salmon with crackling skin, served with a hollandaise sauce so creamy that every crunchy bean aspires to be coated in it. Alas, none of these were evident. You only need one thing to ruin a magical IKEA shopping experience, this was it.

RM3.50

The quintessential breakfast staple is only available for lunch here (why?). The nasi lemak could do with a little bit more of everything: more ikan bilis, more sambal and more lemak in the rice, please. It’s still, very much, a nap-inducing meal – well, that’s what the display IKEA beds and sofas are for.

RM11.50

Two fillets of classic salmon come with a healthy helping of lettuce and a sweet mustard sauce that may be too saccharine even for a Scandinavian native. But this dish is all about the fish, which was fresh and lightly tinged with a touch of dill and pepper. Give it a squeeze of lemon and you’re good to go.

From RM5 for two pieces

Wong Ah Wah chicken wings, they’re not. But these juicy wings, slicked with a salty crunch, keep people fighting over for, literally. They disappear the second the staff lay down the tray – you’ll find people hogging the tongs, scrabbling at the counter for leftover chicken skin, and throwing death stares at people who dare interject them. It’s a surprise no one has marched into the kitchen yet.

From RM12 for ten pieces

The flagship IKEA meal where you’ll actually get a tiny Swedish flag as a garnish. Bouncy meatballs with lingonberry jam in brown cream sauce appease the hungry hordes who regretfully bought one too many spatulas or can’t find the elusive exit. The hearty meatballs are actually good when they’re not overcooked. IKEA has also released their ‘healthy’ veggie balls, but why would anyone volunteer to go through such torture?