With so many people crammed into such a tiny space, they say you’re never alone in Hong Kong. They’ve obviously never been single here. We could have written endlessly on how much it sucks to be a singleton (not that we're bitter or anything), but we don’t want you to get too depressed so here’s the 11 absolute worst facets of single life in Hong Kong.
If you're maybe considering taking to Tinder to potentially remedy the situation, here's what to expect.
Getting by in our SAR is hard enough without having to pay the full rent on a flat by yourself. You end up living with some stranger who never does the washing up, or that guy you found on Craigslist who uses all the bandwidth downloading “wholesome materials” using your broadband. Alternatively, you could just live at home with your parents. Which brings us to the next point...
If you do miraculously meet Mr or Miss right, go out a few times and feel ready to turn things up a notch, there’s nowhere to take them to do the deed. Even if it’s just a bit of Netflix and chill, it’s nice to have some privacy. But with so many of us living with our parents into adulthood, where do we go for some alone time? An Ikea bedroom? $7 hotdog anyone?
Not only are they constantly ‘gramming themselves, they take every opportunity to rub it in your face. Yeah we get it, you're adorable, every breath is a gift. You won't be smiling when it all comes tumbling down. Then I'll win.
Sometimes all you want to do after a long day is crash on the sofa and order a takeaway. There are plenty of services that will deliver to your door and thousands of restaurants to choose from but when you’re on your own, you have to order far more than you want to fulfill the minimum. To top it all off – when you open the bag there are two sets of cutlery. Devastating.
If you decide you’d rather eat out, there’s no peace here either. The pitying looks from the waiter as they says, “will anyone be joining you?" The ritual removal of the other plate and cutlery and when the bill comes – brings it all into crushing reality.
With two-for-one at the cinema and buy-one-get-one-free happy hours, there’s only so many times you can ask your best friend to come along to grab the best offers. There are even discounts for couples at the gym when it’s the single people who need to be working out.
To add insult to injury when heading home to spend another night on your own, you can’t even split a cab fare to make yourself feel better. At least Hong Kong taxis are super cheap. So there's that. Great.
So you’re working until 10pm every night of the week and even clocking in at the weekends to try and get ahead. When exactly are you suppose to find time to meet someone, let alone arrange a date? Oh well, at least you’re not going to be be the victim of a scam.
Tired of being asked the same boring question? You probably feel like telling your Auntie: “give me my lai see and shut up!” Well at least if you’re single forever you’ll never have to give out any cash. In your face, Auntie!
Ever been stopped for directions to the Star Ferry? To donate to charity? To sign a petition? Or fill out a survey? That wouldn’t happen if you had a human shield on your arm, or at least you can palm off your other half on them. The fact is: single people are easy targets and there’s only so much time you can pretend to be talking on the phone before your arm gets tired.
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