There's so much going on this month we're exhausted just writing it up - from high quality cine-strands to big name comedy in really wee spaces, via the only Eurovision winners we've ever enjoyed unironically. Yep, that's them pictured above.
Theatre & Dance
The Slab Boys, Citizens Theatre, until Sat Mar 14
John Byrne’s play about two adolescent workers in a carpet factory is a giant of 20th century Scottish theatre; actor and theatremaker David Hayman is no small fry himself. We can't wait to see how the latter directs the former in this new production.
Rambert Dance: Rooster, Theatre Royal, Thu Mar 5-Sat Mar 7
Choreographer Christopher Bruce’s bright and sassy tribute to the 1960s (via the music of the Rolling Stones) is revived following a 13-year absence.
The King’s Speech, Theatre Royal, Mon Mar 16-Sat Mar 21
Who’d have thought Jason Donovan would ever be cast as ‘the old guy’? Still, here he is, taking on the role made famous by Geoffrey Rush as the speech therapist to Raymond Coulthard’s stuttering King George IV. Given that writer David Seidler penned the movie script with a stage play in mind, we’re excited to see how the live version pans out.
The Adventures of Robin Hood, Platform, Wed Mar 18
The highly regarded Visible Fictions kids’ theatre company have previous form in swashbuckling adventure, with adaptations of 'Zorro', 'Jason and the Argonauts' and 'Peter Pan' under their belt. This time, their turn their attention to Sherwood Forest’s most famous inhabitant.
Buzzcut, Pearce Institute, Wed Mar 18-Sun Mar 22
The cutting edge theatre fest makes its annual bow at Govan’s Pearce Institute, with performers like Nic Green, Eilidh MacAskill, Harry Giles and Jenna Watt all contributing to the programme. That programme is as-yet-unrevealed at the time of writing, but given that it’s an unticketed, pay-what-you-want theatre fest, we reckon it’s worth a punt regardless.
The Absence of War, Citizens Theatre, Tue Mar 31-Sat Apr 4
With the general election looming, Headlong Theatre have made the canny choice to resurrect David Hare’s 1993 play about a hopeful Labour candidate on the eve of his shot at the big time.
Comedy
Kevin Bridges, The Stand, Mar 2, 6-8 & 12
Nipping in just before his comedy mentor Frankie (see below), the boy Bridges installs himself at The Stand for a series of new material work-outs.
Count Arthur Strong, The Pavilion, Sun Mar 8
Not content to join in the rest of the comedy rush later on this month (see below), Steve Delaney’s luvvie comedy creation is hogging the limelight ahead of time, in the suitably theatrical surroundings of the Pavilion Theatre.
Frankie Boyle, The Stand, Mar 9, 11 & 22
The bad boy of Scottish comedy promises ‘I’m Better Than This’ in a series of work-in-progress sessions at the city’s premier comedy den.
Glasgow International Comedy Festival, various venues, Thu Mar 12-Sun Mar 29
There are almost too many top-line GICF performers to fit into this tiny wee paragraph – that’s why we’ve chucked them in this more spacious comedy fest preview instead. Tommy Tiernan, Bridget Christie and Burnistoun Live are our top picks, if you must know.
Art
Kari Robertson: Ohmage, SWG3, until 21 Mar
Taking Jean-Luc Godard’s 1970 film 'British Sounds’ as its starting point, this film and sculpture show explores both the relationship between sound and image, and how technology has impacted how we communicate.
The Ballet of the Palette, Gallery of Modern Art, until Sun Jan 24 2016
This selection of 20th century paintings was chosen by contemporary artists featured in the GoMA’s equivalent 2013 exhibition. We’re almost certain we know what’s going to happen with the exhibition after this one.
Jessica Ramm: Earth Rise, Tramway, Sat Mar 14-Sun Apr 19
Sculpture show examining the intersection between nature, humans and technology, including documentation of Ramm’s performance-based works.
Film
Chappie, general release from Fri Mar 6
Following the spectacular 'District 9', we were a bit underwhelmed with Neill Blomkamp’s 'Elysium', a space-age sci-fi that felt a bit too Hollywood for our liking. Thankfully, the director’s back on home turf with this South African robot flick, with none-more-offbeat casting: Hugh Jackman, 'Slumdog Millionaire's Dev Patel and rave-rap duo Die Antwoord.
Hyena, general release from Fri Mar 6
A gritty, London-set corrupt cops thriller than manages to put a fresh spin on over-familiar material, Gerard Johnson’s follow-up to low-key serial killer drama 'Tony' is well worth your time.
Still Alice, general release from Fri Mar 6
Julianne Moore won an Oscar for her incredible performance in this drama about a middle-aged woman who discovers she has early-onset Alzheimer’s. Not exactly pass-the-popcorn material, we admit, but it's one of the most powerful turns you'llsee this year.
Glasgow Short Film Festival, CCA, Wed Mar 11-Sun Mar 15
Having split off from the Glasgow Film Festival proper in order to truly flex its creative muscles, the Glasgow Short Film Festival has revealed a cracking programme for 2015. Our top two events include the startling Vertical Cinema – a screening that flips the traditional landscape cinema screen on its side and asks filmmakers to create content especially for the new format – and Strange Electricity, a screening-and-club match-up featuring Optimo's JD Twitch, Golden Teacher and Sähkö Recordings abel boss Jimi Tenor.
Matchbox Cineclub, The Old Hairdressers, Thu Mar 19
After palling up with the Glasgow Film Festival last month, the Matchbox Cineclub is back under its own steam, with a screening of 'Who Are You, Polly Magoo?' It's a stylish 1960s satire of the fashion industry, and you're encouraged to dress up in the film's signature black-and-white stripes. As if you needed an excuse.
Glitch 2015, CCA, Thu Mar 19-Sun Mar 28
‘A queer/ trans/ intersex/ people of colour film festival’ is how Digital Desperadoes describe their 11-day residency at the CCA, though naturally they say it in neon pink block capitals. Their selection of short and feature-length film screenings is complemented by a range of ‘video art, spoken word, filmmaker Q&As, panel discussions, live music and free haircuts’ – check out their website for more info.
Mommy, selected release from Fri Mar 20
French-Canadian stylist supreme Xavier Dolan delivers a compassionate, dramatic companion piece to his similarly excellent debut 'I Killed My Mother'.
Club Noir Film Night, Grosvenor Cinema, Sat Mar 22
A glamorous Golden Age double-bill interspersed with burlesque performances and nibbles; ‘Some Like it Hot’ and ‘To Catch a Thief’ are the movies set to be enhanced with pre-show performances by Debay Delux and Lila D’Lacy.
All Night Horror Madness, Grosvenor Cinema, Sat Mar 28
One of the most exciting nights on the film calendar, this dusk-til-dawn horror marathon is never less than electric. The line-up for this, its ninth-and-a-half outing (don't ask), is particularly spectacular: 'The Thing', 'Halloween III: Season of the Witch', 'Slugs: The Movie', 'Child’s Play' and a surprise movie, plus contemporary trashy trailers, all screening from gloriously authentic 35mm prints.
Things to Do
Jon Ronson, Citizens Theatre, Fri Mar 20
He’s conducted a psychopath test, stared at goats and penned works on craziness, extremism and Frank Sidebottom. Now author, journalist, broadcaster and filmmaker Ronson shares his exploits that, while funny enough to earn their place in the Glasgow International Comedy Festival line-up, are numerous and varied enough for him to merit his own wee spotlight blurb here.
Ingenious Impressions: The Coming of the Book, Hunterian Art Gallery, until Sun Jun 21
Books, eh? If you’re anything like us, you’re a big fan. You’re especially enamoured with musty old volumes from the dawn of printing, inscribed with spidery scrawls and intricate illustrations. Well, it turns out you (and we) are in luck, as the University of Glasgow – together with the Hunterian Gallery – has one of the UK’s most important collections of early books, and is displaying them as part of the Glasgow Incunabula Project.
Disney On Ice, SECC, Thu Mar 26-Sun Mar 29
Ok, it might sound ever so slightly naff, but let’s be honest: you almost certainly know a child that is absolutely mental for ‘Frozen’, and Disney on Ice is the live outing that movie was made for. Other ice-skating characters include Ariel from ‘The Little Mermaid’ and Belle from ‘Beauty and the Beast’, but let’s be honest, it’s all about Anna, Elsa and Olaf at this stage.
Rally & Broad, Stereo, Sun Mar 29
‘Dance While The Sky Crashes Down’ is the subtitle for this edition of R&B’s poetry cabaret afternoon, with end-of-the-world entertainments from No More Tiger, Apocalypse Redux (aka Bram Gieben and Sam Small), Calum Rodger, Hannah Jane Walker and Josephine Sillars.
Music & Nightlife
Placebo, O2 Academy, Sun Mar 1
Two decades since they formed, Brian Molko and his glam-grunge-pop troupe are still churning out the tunes. They now have seven albums to pick from when they play live, and tend to go for fan favourites rather than indulging those who've just come along to hear the hits, but are still known to drop 'Nancy Boy' and 'Every You Every Me' when the fancy takes them.
Years and Years, King Tuts, Tue Mar 3
Winners of the BBC Sound of 2015 poll, this could be Years and Years’ year. Fronted by Olly Alexander – also an actor, and familiar with these parts after his lead role in Stuart Murdoch’s film ‘God Help The Girl’ – the London quartet make danceable electro-pop with an urban twist that’s bang on trend.
Lionel Richie, The SSE Hydro, Thu Mar 5
Gazillion-selling soul and R&B smoothie Richie comes to Glasgow to get The Hydro crowd dancing on the ceiling with his fairly explanatorily titled 'All the Hits All Night Long' Tour.
Requiem for Edward Snowden, CCA, Thu Mar 5
Theatre Cryptic presents a new A/V performance from experimental electronica composer Matthew Collings, exploring themes of privacy and security.
Abdominal & the Obliques, Nice’n’Sleazy, Fri Mar 6
Funky alt.hip hop from the Jurassic 5 school, with MC Abs less likely to touch on topics like guns, bitches and bling than, say, bicycling, train stations and his mum.
Noel Gallagher’s High-Flying Birds, Hydro, Sat Mar 7
The man behind such hit insults as 'he’s like a man with a fork in a world full of soup' (on Liam Gallagher, 2009) and 'he’s like Zorro on donuts' (on Jack White, 2005), as well as occasionally some music, Noel Gallagher is back with ‘Chasing Yesterday’, his second solo album under the moniker High Flying Birds. Expect new material interspersed with one or two Oasis sing-alongs, if you ask nicely.
Bigfoot’s Tea Party, The Art School, Sat Mar 7
Berlin’s Mr Ties and Rekids/Work Them Records champ Spencer Parker deliver a four hour back-to-back session at Bigfoot’s latest house and techno shindig.
Melting Pot, The Admiral, Sat Mar 7
House and disco legend Joey Negro headlines Melting Pot’s 14th birthday, with assistance from Sub Rosa residents Spittal and Nowicki.
Idlewild, O2 ABC, Sat Mar 7 & Sun Mar 8
Following a hiatus since 2010 (during which time various members have gone off on solo jollies), Scotland’s favourite literate indie rock band is back with new album ‘Everything Ever Written’. Their two nights at the O2 ABC are likely to be particularly delicious to Glasgow gig-goers, as the Edinburgh group have as yet neglected to book a hometown show for this tour.
Spandau Ballet, The SSE Hydro, Sun Mar 8
All together now: ‘GOLD! (gold!) Always believe in your sooooooul…’ That’s right, Tony Hadley, the Kemps and co are back on the road, embarking on a world tour to promote their new greatest hits collection.
Tune-yards, The Art School, Mon Mar 9
Nope, we couldn’t be bothered replicating Merrill Garbus’s caps-on/caps-off formatting. Instead, we’ll just praise her entirely unique, off-kilter wonky pop skills and meet you down the front.
Clean Bandit, O2 Academy, Tue Mar 10
The uber-catchy, classically-inflected electronica group take a break from occupying the charts for weeks on end to play some live dates. If you’re a fan, we reckon there’s no place you’d rather be (ahem).
The Charlatans, Barrowland, Tue Mar 10 & Wed Mar 11
Tim Burgess, having contributed indelibly to internet culture, is back on leading man duties for his crew of Britpop icons – they’re touring their 12th album, 'Modern Nature', which came out in January.
The Handsome Family, St Andrew’s in the Square, Wed Mar 11
The alt.country darlings received a bit of a boost last year thanks to their song ‘Far From Any Road’ being used as the intro music to superlative TV show ‘True Detective’. Their gothic Americana shtick should fit right in at the restored St Andrews church hall.
The Selecter, O2 ABC, Thu Mar 12
Given the 2 Tone group’s fractious pattern of reunions and side-projects over the years, it’s probably worth clarifying: this line-up of The Selecter features vocalists Pauline Black and Arthur ‘Gaps’ Hendrickson, but not original songwriter Neol Davies. Should still be a skankin’ good time regardless.
Underworld, Glasgow Royal Concert Hall, Thu Mar 12
Electronica titans Underworld have come a long way since the ravey days of the ’80s and ’90s, with an Olympics opening ceremony and a massive back catalogue remastering project under their belts. They’ve reached the point now where they can bring their visually augmented live show to the prestigious Glasgow Royal Concert Hall, where they’ll be playing through their progressive techno masterpiece ‘dubnobasswithmyheadman’.
ELEMNTS#1, The Old Hairdressers, Fri Mar 13
A new platform for ‘avant-garde, do-it-yourself’ and experimental music in Glasgow, the ELEMNTS project aims to bring together new sounds with visual and video art installations – this first instalment features music from Machines in Heaven, Modifier, Phoene and Arm Watches Fingers, with the visual contingent repped by Joe Crogan, Annukka Havukumpu and James McCann.
Laidback Luke, The Arches, Fri Mar 13
If you were lumbered with the handle Lucas Cornelis van Scheppingen, you’d probably plump for a more relaxed moniker as well. The house producer and former graffiti artist hits The Arches with assistance from D.O.D.
Sankeys, The Arches, Sat Mar 14
The Manchester clubbing institution celebrates 20 years in action with a stellar line-up: Darius Syrossian, Sidney Charles, Andrea Oliva, Jozef K and Manu Gonzalez represent Team Sank, while Toolroom Records takes over the dance arch with Mark Knight, Mark Storie and Weiss.
Sam Smith, O2 Academy, Mon Mar 16 & Tue Mar 17
We’re amazed Sam Smith is still able to walk around, given the number of Grammys, Brits and high profile collaborations being flung at him on a regular basis. Ok, so his biggest hit may have been a rip-off, but there’s no need to be petty.
Usher, The SSE Hydro, Tue Mar 17
Get your R&B on with one of the planet’s smoothest proponents, here embarking on his #URXTOUR. Because what’s a tour these days if it’s not a hashtag?
Andy C, Sub Club, Thu Mar 19
The drum’n’bass kingpin hits Glasgow on the final night of his UK-wide ‘All Night Long’ tour. If you’re wondering about support, there isn’t any – the clue’s in the name.
Paloma Faith, The SSE Hydro, Fri Mar 20
Expect soulful pop music that’s simultaneously off-kilter and polished, all adorned with a fabulous wardrobe.
Cut Hands, Stereo, Fri Mar 20
Prepare for a night of brutal voodoo rhythms as former Whitehouse man William Bennett unleashes ‘Festival of the Dead’, his latest exploration of Haitian/African techno.
Rustie, The Arches, Fri Mar 20
LuckyMe’s prodigal son returns to Glasgow for a brief gig-hours stop on his Green Language World Tour, bringing maximalist tactile electronica to the home team.
Ten Walls, The Arches, Fri Mar 20
Look forward to a full A/V show from Lithuanian house innovator Mario Basanov (he of ‘Walking with Elephants’ fame), with support from London duo Maribou State and Simple Records/Aus Music bossman Will Saul.
Wilko Johnson, O2 ABC, Fri Mar 20
Following a victorious battle with pancreatic cancer, the Dr Feelgood guitarist is back on the road following 2013’s thankfully misnomered ‘farewell tour’.
Mega Hair, The Old Hairdressers, Sat Mar 21
The adventurous Glasgow venue celebrates its fifth birthday with a music all-dayer featuring kindred spirits Ashtray Navigations, Mick Flower, Family Elan, Ela Orleans, Apostille and Sue Tompkins.
Morrissey, The SSE Hydro, Sat Mar 21
The headline-grabbing ex-Smiths man (not to mention stirring soloist in his own right) brings his immaculate lyrical pop and forthright opinions to Glasgow's largest stage.
Chic featuring Nile Rodgers, O2 Academy, Mon Mar 23
We don’t think anybody predicted the remarkable resurgence of Nile Rodgers a few years back but, with new (old) material forthcoming and a collabo with the world’s hippest dance act under his belt, the funkmaster general is going from strength to strength.
Warpaint, O2 ABC, Tue Mar 24
Fans of the LA post-punk quartet have been waiting for this rescheduled gig since December; they can take comfort in the fact that it’s been scaled down from the O2 Academy to the relatively more intimate O2 ABC.
Sleater-Kinney, O2 ABC, Wed Mar 25
The newly reformed riot grrrl rock group visit our shores with new album ‘No Cities to Love’ in tow – an album we said ‘roars and rages and slips and slides with the force of old.’
Hoodie Allen, The Garage, Wed Mar 25
Given the concurrent Glasgow International Comedy Festival, we figured this might be one of those parody acts where the excellent name came first and the so-so material duly followed. Not so – Long Islander Steven Adam Markowitz makes upbeat poppy hip hop that, while smattered with humour, is a far cry from his namesake’s neuroses.
Red Bull Music Academy, various venues, Thu Mar 26-Sun Mar 29
Danny Brown heads up this stellar club-culture weekend, taking part in a discussion event as well as performing on a roster that includes Koreless, Derrick May and Mykki Blanco. You can check out the full schedule in our preview.
Sacred Paws, Mono, Thu Mar 26
Not to be confused with grungy noisemakers Paws, Ailidh Rodgers and Rachel Aggs are a Rock Action-signed indie-pop duo whose tropical summery melodies recall the Djangos, Bwani Junction and the like. They’re launching their new ‘Six Songs’ EP on this tour.
The Subways, Oran Mor, Thu Mar 26
English rock trio celebrating the release of their self-produced, self-titled fourth album with a string of UK dates.
Charli XCX, Queen Margaret Union, Fri Mar 27
Born in Hertfordshire to a Scottish father and a Ugandan mother of Indian heritage, there’s a tonne of places chart-topping electro-pop princess can lay claim to. But we’re gonna focus on the Scottish dad bit, and say this show will be extra-special.
Lordi, Classic Grand, Fri Mar 27
You remember Lordi (pictured above) – the gothed-up Swedish metal posse that formed a perfectly dark counterpoint to the tacky sugariness of Eurovision a few years back (and ended up scooping the top prize)? Now’s yer chance to see ‘em in the flesh. And be amused by any lost-looking people yelling for 'Royals'.
The Vaccines, The Old Fruitmarket, Sun Mar 29
After somewhat prematurely being labeled the saviors of rock’n’roll in 2010 (leading to their excellently-named album-length riposte, ‘What Did You Expect From the Vaccines?’), the indie four-piece took a break in 2013. They’re back now, trying out new material from forthcoming album ‘English Graffiti’.