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Transvestite Mom: Arayaissaree Akeuchugorn, 53
Audiences burst into round applause. Curtains are lowered. Day Young Show, the first stage performance in seven years of one of the kingdom’s most famous drag showgirls Arayaissaree Akeuchugorn, better known as Day Freeman, has come to an end. The drag queen walks slowly to the dressing room where her 11-year-old son Achanchayuth “Aum” Akeuchugorn sits waiting for his mother. Day is not Aum’s maternal mother. Aum was in fact born to Day’s sister who couldn’t afford to take care of her newborn son. The entertainer, who had already adopted two other children (now grown up with their own families), made a decision to adopt the six-month-old baby. And there came the turning point in her life.
“Once I adopted him, I quit all the late-night shows even though those were the biggest sources of my income,” Day relates. “Working late wasn’t good for my health. He was so little, so young. I couldn’t risk being ill. I needed to offer him the best care. I wasn’t earning as much as I did before, but I had more time to take care of him, and that was vital. For newborn babies, it matters not what kind of mother you are—a baby just needs warmth, love, and understanding.”
From the beginning, Day has never lied to her son about her sexual orientation. “The truth is always the truth and so is the vaccine. He’s learned since day one that I am what I am, that he’s adopted, and there’s another woman—his biological mother—who loves him but for certain reasons couldn’t take care of him,” Days discloses. “I told him that he has a lot of mothers that all love him, and that he’s more privileged in this way. I take him to places, to where I work to show him that I’m welcomed everywhere because I am what I am. So he’s learned that mama is great. I’ve been showing him the positive side so he feels proud of me enough that my sexual orientation is not a big deal. So when people try to make fun of me, asking if his mom is a ladyboy, he would just reply “yes” and that’s it—just like telling your friend your mom is an actor. If you didn’t show your kid you respect yourself, how could he do so? I didn’t want him feeling guilty for having a ladyboy for a mother.”
It’s been more than a decade since Aum came into Day’s life and, she reveals, there was never a single moment that she felt exhausted or wanted to give up. The ladyboy who will never bear her own child candidly shares that she doesn’t know what makes a good mother; she only knows that motherhood comes from inside. “The sense of motherhood comes from within. It lives in your heart and soul, and it has nothing to do with gender.” Day admits, however that, as a transvestite, she must do things twice as much to prove herself as a mother. “I have to do everything 200 percent. I’m a katoey. I need to prove I can be a mother of a boy. A quality mother.” Looking at Aum now, who has grown up to become a well-behaved adorable boy, you can say that Day doesn’t have much to prove anymore.
She leaves a message to people who are considering adoption. “Don’t ever think that you’ll only care for a kid so that he or she can take care of you when you’re old. You adopt them so
they can live a good life. It’s for them, not you,” Day says. “And don’t draw the future for them. Let them draw their own path, build their own
world. If my son can grow up to be a good citizen
of the world, then I’m happy.”
Modern Moms
Time Out Bangkok celebrates the month of Thai Mother’s Day by sitting down with three moms who exemplify alternative ideas of parenthood and prove that being a great mom starts from finding pride in one’s self.
Written by: Phavitch Theeraphong
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