27 London alleyways the heart-eyes emoji was created for

Thanks to a historic street grid that cocks a snook at so-called 'urban planning', London is riddled with irresistibly squirrelly alleys, passages, courts and shortcuts.

Not only do they provide locals with a safe space for frantic post-club make-outs, public urination and Dickensian fisticuffs, many of them even have a brilliant pub at the end. Join us as we take a glimpse down these pretty paths less travelled.

1) Faulkner's Alley, Farringdon

 

A photo posted by Lungi (@lungi_86) on Jun 7, 2013 at 12:12pm PDT

A strong start. Great gate, even better sign.

2) Lamb's Conduit Passage, Holborn

 

A photo posted by @stesabelle on Feb 18, 2016 at 5:11am PST

Told you there'd be pubs. That's the Dolphin Tavern.

3) Ely Court, Farringdon

 

A photo posted by [♥️] (@principessamy) on May 10, 2016 at 5:46am PDT

And that's the Ye Olde Mitre Tavern, celebrating its 470th birthday this year!

4) Meard Street, Soho

 

A photo posted by Dean Whatmuff (@dinowhatmuffski) on Apr 30, 2016 at 9:00am PDT

It sounds like shit to the French, but there's no secret fecal past to this Soho street. There's no pub either, but there is a branch of Honest Burgers.

5) Brydge's Place

 

A photo posted by Andy Kirby (@akirbs) on Aug 19, 2015 at 3:48am PDT

This is London's skinniest alleyway, apparently just eighteen inches wide at its narrowest point. THAT IS RIDICULOUS. 

6) Royal Opera Arcade, St. James

 

A photo posted by Terence Jou (@terjou) on Apr 12, 2015 at 4:41am PDT

A fancy little arcade of shops off Pall Mall.

7) Wine Office Court, City of London

 

A photo posted by @lorraine.lesley on Apr 16, 2016 at 11:42pm PDT

Ah, and here's Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese, another centuries-old boozer that's all higgledy-piggledy inside.

8) Passing Alley, Clerkenwell

 

A photo posted by Maitane Torca (@maitane_torca) on May 19, 2015 at 12:24pm PDT

Yep, EXPLORE is really written on the walls, using some kind of occult perspective trickery. It's from Clerkenwell Design Week.

9) Artillery Lane, Spitalfields

 

A photo posted by @p0kip0ks on Mar 20, 2016 at 4:53pm PDT

Home of The Breakfast Club. 

10) St. Chad's Place, King's Cross

 

A photo posted by mark H. Love London Life (@grubsterslondon) on Mar 29, 2016 at 4:03am PDT

Just a quiet spot for a bit of old-fashioned Friday night murderin'.

11) Neal's Yard, Covent Garden

 

A photo posted by 오이양 (@silverrain52) on May 12, 2016 at 11:46pm PDT

Such pretty colours! Try popping into Native at the end.

12) Newman Passage, Fitzrovia

 

A photo posted by T2theN_Go (@t2then_go) on Jun 19, 2015 at 9:09am PDT

This cute shortcut will lead you to the Newman Arms.

13) Bull Inn Court, Covent Garden

 

A photo posted by Sophie Mitchell (@smitchio) on Sep 7, 2015 at 2:28pm PDT

Just off the Strand, head down this passage to the Nell Gwynne.

14) Cecil Court, Covent Garden

 

A photo posted by 느림보욘, Slow Yon (@slow_yon) on Nov 6, 2015 at 5:56pm PST

Sitting between Charing Cross Road and St. Martin's Lane, it might just be the inspiration for Harry Potter's Diagon Alley.

15) St. Martin's Court, Covent Garden

 

A photo posted by @neebop on Dec 3, 2015 at 11:05am PST

This alley obviously makes a special effort at Christmas.

16) Denman Place, Soho

 

A photo posted by Steve LLamb (@lluxoperon) on Jan 10, 2016 at 2:27pm PST

The lesser-seen twenty-first century alley, complete with LED lighting underfoot.

17) Saffron Hill, Clerkenwell

 

A photo posted by Neil Avey (@neilinbengeo) on Apr 14, 2016 at 1:18pm PDT

A little shortcut near Farringdon station.

18) Dansey Place, Chinatown

 

A photo posted by @sooze_e on Nov 14, 2015 at 6:26pm PST

You can pick up some amazing ingredients down here, for one million authenticity points. 

19) Goodwin's Court, Covent Garden

 

A photo posted by Linn (@linn_stolan) on Jul 28, 2015 at 2:43pm PDT

Just a fine alley. So fine.

20) St. Christopher's Place, Bond Street

 

A photo posted by Maria Mediavilla (@sittingonthesea) on May 4, 2016 at 8:15am PDT

Prone to outbreaks of decoration, which is what you get in the posh bit of town.

21) Cloth Court, Farringdon

 

A photo posted by @carolynelw on Apr 15, 2015 at 1:11am PDT

Ah, another hidden pub! Here's the Rising Sun. 

22) Lazenby Court, Covent Garden

 

A photo posted by Anne (@version3point1) on Mar 15, 2016 at 6:21pm PDT

Beyond that figure lies the Lamb and Flag, 'just about as perfect a pub as you’ll find in the West End.'

23) Steelyard Passage, City of London 

 

A photo posted by An English Gentleman in London (@thebowlerman) on Oct 30, 2014 at 5:34am PDT

Would you believe us if we told you at the end of this alley... was a riverside pub?

24) Crown Passage, St. James's

 

A photo posted by niamhbrownlee (@niamhbrownlee) on Aug 4, 2013 at 12:10am PDT

You've spotted it, right? That's the unashamedly old-fashioned Red Lion pub.

25) Shepherd Market, Mayfair

 

A photo posted by Denise Medrano (@thewinesleuth) on Apr 5, 2016 at 3:25pm PDT

A great alley. A pub called Ye Grapes. We could be very happy here.

26) Ropewalk, Bermondsey

 

A photo posted by @jwhoran on Aug 16, 2015 at 12:12pm PDT

Home to the much-loved Maltby St. Market.

27) French Ordinary Court, Fenchurch St.

 

A photo posted by Tessie (@tessieosteel) on Jan 4, 2014 at 2:15am PST

No ornamentation here. Just fine, fine brickwork. Those curves. Oh boy.

Essential further reading for alley fans: Londonist's Back Passage series (ho ho) and this exhaustive guide to the city's narrowest thoroughfares. 

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